Sepideh Saremi

So, after a long time of seeing my dream professional life as a big mystery or something out of reach or very convoluted, today I had a clear glimpse of what I want as an attainable thing, something that combines a lot of the things I am good at with a medium I’ve never tried. I saw a glimpse of a path. And tomorrow I’m going to try to convince some people that I should get a try at it, that I might be great at it. It took an email from Penelope Trunk to make me realize that I can see myself like this and that I can try for it. It doesn’t mean I am not scared, which I am, but I am going to try.

So I am setting myself up for possible rejection. All rejection is awkward and totally uncomfortable, and anyone who says different is lying or a masochist, but if I don’t gun for this, I will have wasted a big chance. And by writing about this here, I’m holding myself accountable to actually going for it.

I am also thinking about this as setting myself up for the opposite of rejection. Which is acceptance? Or opportunity? Whatever you want to call it. I am trying to visualize that, to make it more possible.

I think more than all that, it is exciting to have identified what I see as a possible path, because even if this chance doesn’t pan out, I know what I need to do to prepare myself for future chances. To make it happen for myself, eventually.

Besides, what is more awkward and uncomfortable than getting rejected is spending the rest of your entire professional life wishing you had tried something (or in this case, asked to be allowed to try) when you were young and didn’t have much to lose. That is a regret I’m not prepared to face when I am an old lady.

Also, I do firmly believe I will rock at this thing I want to try. So there.